I don’t know how it is in the USA, but there’s another more or less middle-class tradition here in the countries that formerly belonged under the Austria-Hungary empire and that is formal dancing lessons. Boys go there at the age of 17, girls at 16, mostly “unpaired” and even when they are, the dance teacher orders partner switches several times per lesson. The dances taught are basically those like in the dance competitions including latin ones, but in the “common dance floor” variant; some lecturing in the behavior at banquets or rauts is also included.

Included in the course are at least three “ball-like” lessons and in general something approaching formal attire is requested, so that the young ladies and gentlemen So that the kids at our “prom night” don’t dress-up in the suits and shoulder-free ball gowns for the first time, usually.

You’re right with that comment about how formerly those who didn’t fit just went away to find a better place for themselves. Now it seems to me, that forcing those around me to comply and laugh at their unease is the way to go. Unfortunately.

I myself didn’t exactly fit in at the high school years and years ago, being a nerdy geeky 5′ 10 bespectacled girl, but when I think about that after all those years – I don’t think I would have been happier if there would have been an option to “force them” with the help of the law to accept me. Interpersonal relationships just don’t work that way.

Someone at another blog wrote about the terrible small-minded small towns while praising some “lesbian towns” in Massachusetts. That gave me some thought – can’t we have towns with a traditional mindsets as well as the other ones?

Sorry for the long outpouring.

At the Czech equivalent of a high school we also have sorta prom night, but there is a small detail that would not allow Constances of this world show of such an extent – no-one cares about any (or no) dates, only the formal attire is requested.
At the festive moment
http://www.malgym.cz/data/ples2.jpg
only the students of the last year enter the dancing floor and teachers decorate them with sashes of their own design. Then everybody applauds and afterwards a formal dance with teachers followed by a dance with their own parents follows.
And that’s it – so the only problem in the Czech variant might be a tux – but some girls wear trousers and corsages as well…